A Write Good!: The News report
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(Christchurch, New Zealand) Researchers in New Zealand have found that Lego faces have grown angrier since the 1990s and that the popular toys may pose a risk to themselves and their loved ones.
“All the warning signs have been there. I mean, just look at the pirates – their pain, their despondency. It’s etched into their faces,” said facial recognition expert Enid Thimmel. “Well, not etched. I think they use decals. Or stencils. It’s not paint, is it?
“Regardless, you store these toys near the liquor cabinet, you’re just asking for trouble.”
Famously recognized for their iconic smiley features, by the mid-90s only about 80 percent of the Lego figurines wore happy faces. By 2010 that proportion had dropped to 50 percent, according to the team of academics from the University of Canterbury who arrived at their conclusion through scientific analysis of figurines facial expressions – an exhaustive process that involved months of playing with the toys, then goofing around with video games, ordering pizza, and marathon viewings of The Matrix movies followed by a lot of prank calls.
New Zealand study reveals subtle changes in facial expressions of Lego figures over three decades.
Parents groups have been quick to voice their concerns.
“We’ve long been aware of a sense of unrest among the Lego toys, especially the Star Wars Death Star action figures,” said Hillary Castern, president of Parents Without Pit Bulls.
“For instance, Janet Kilber’s mother said that my Carolyn smacked Janet – her very best friend – with a strut from a Corporate Alliance Tank Droid. Clearly, that was provoked by Boba Fett, possibly even Princess Leia.
“Janet’s mother’s a bitch,” she noted.
Child psychologists and industry experts are conflicted over how best to address the Lego figurines deep emotional distress. The toys are not responsible for what is a potentially treatable mental illness. On the other hand, they’re so easy to melt on a hot skillet.
In the swirl of controversy, the Denmark-based Lego Group has already canceled plans for its 2014 rollout of mini figures based on Russell Crowe.
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